I learned something about God’s love a while ago, when I was having a difficult time at work. He said to me that I couldn’t do my job any better, because I was dedicated and I meant well. I was doing my best, so that’s all I could do. It was as if God was smiling at me, and proud of me.
A wave of love washed over me. I realized that God’s love for me is personal — he cares about me as an individual. He doesn’t love me because he has to. He loves me like a loving parent would — is proud of me when I’m trying, and is moved when I truly say sorry. His love is not neutral, as if he sees all people the same way. He sees every aspect of my life, right down to the last detail.
I usually think God is ashamed of me and can’t look at me because I’m a “bad Christian.” But God cares about me and what I do. He’s sad when I’m upset. Just because I don’t hear him straight away when I cry out, doesn’t mean he’s not upset and feeling for me. He’s truly loving, and there are no rules or laws that can ever separate us.
I’m not alone anymore, and fighting the world on my own. I finally have someone who loves me. And he always will, no matter what I do, even if I don’t understand him. He gave up his life for me. Personally.
God holds onto me, and will bring me where I need to be. He’ll heal my heart, far beyond my attempts to heal myself. It’s alright when I’m hurting. He’s holding me, even if I’m not looking at him and can’t see it.
God asks so little of us. We only need to accept Jesus as our savior, ask him to be with us, and make small steps to slowly include God in our lives. What he gives us will always far outweigh what we could ever give him. God’s love is personal, for everyone. He cares deeply about every single person, not based on how good they are, or what they’ve done — but because God is love. Just ask him to be with you. It’s all he wants.
~ Mona Hanna ~